


The Moment I Knew

by daddyoshie



Category: Hockey RPF, Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: 2018 Stanley Cup Final, 2018 Stanley Cup Playoffs, AU where mojo never got traded, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Slow Burn, Washington Capitals, the nicky/ovi is really just background
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-20 08:35:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16133603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daddyoshie/pseuds/daddyoshie
Summary: They don't realize it right away. But from the start something has always been there. It just takes them a long time to see it.Moments throughout the years, from the very beginning to raising the Stanley Cup.





	The Moment I Knew

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fourthlinewinger](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fourthlinewinger/gifts).



> For Fourthlinewinger - thank you for all your wonderful ideas in your letter, and I tried to keep with the spirit of it, and I wrote something that I really hope you'll enjoy. Only happiness in this fic. I also just want to say that your Mojo/Kuzy fics are some of my favorites, and I hope to do you a little bit of justice with this fic. Hope you enjoy!!
> 
> A huge thanks to hufflepuff4life/holtbaest for all the help on this one.
> 
> A note that this takes place from 2014 when Kuzy entered the league to the 2018 playoffs.

“Marcus, we’re putting you and Troy on Kuzy’s line today. We’re just gonna try it and see how it works.”

Marcus nodded. He’d played with his fair share of centers over the years. Hell, he himself had been the center for a number of lines. The coaches were trying to shake things up, see what stuck and what worked. Marcus was willing to skate with whomever and do whatever the team needed him to do. How much different could this line be from any other?

Marcus locked eyes with Kuzy, who was sitting a row and a half away. Kuzy winked.

“You hear that, Jojo? We gonna be lineys.”

For some reason, Marcus felt his face get hot. But despite how weird that made him feel, he didn’t look away. Kuzy kept looking at him too, smiling big and wiggling his eyebrows.

“No love for me, Kuzy?” Troy interrupted. “I’m hurt.”

Kuzy stuck his tongue out at him.

Marcus didn’t really know what to expect when they stepped out on the practice ice together. Lines were lines, and some lines meshed better than others, but it was still hockey.

But when they started working together, something clicked. It was as if they had gone to some other plane where magic was possible. Every single one of his passes, no matter where he randomly threw the puck, found Kuzy’s stick. And no matter where he was on the ice, no matter what kind of fancy moves he used, Kuzy always managed to land the puck directly on Marcus’s tape. Marcus didn’t even need to keep his eyes open out there. They always knew where the other was going to be, they could always find each other, and they didn’t even need to look.

Marcus couldn’t explain how this feeling surfaced after just one practice. That was why he was convinced there was some kind of magic involved. They just got each other; they complemented each other in a way Marcus had never had with other linemates before. Kuzy drove up the ice with smooth, quick force, and Marcus quietly circled and waited for the snipe.

They tore apart d-pairings and other lines in practice. As Marcus scored yet again on the poor backup goalie, Kuzy skated up and embraced him in the goal hug, a cheeky grin on his face.

“I think we gonna be together a long time, Jojo.”

That was the moment they became linemates.

* * *

Whenever Ovi wanted to hang, the Russian posse was at his beck and call. Whenever Nicky was in the mood, the Swedes got together. Tonight, both groups combined for a night of mass shenanigans. Three Russians, three Swedes.

The evening was held, of course, at Ovi’s house, accompanied by a large spread of food.  Marcus could smell it as he walked through the front door: Japanese dishes, chicken, pasta, leftover borscht from the last time Mama Ovechkina was in town, along with potatoes, rice, bread, and a gargantuan bowl of Caesar salad. Marcus couldn’t wait to dig in.

However, he knew that they were in for an interesting evening once he got inside. Nicky was already tense and frustrated with Ovi, and they were in that too-familiar routine again: Nicky was stiff and glaring, while Ovi kept trying to keep it light and was throwing jokes Nicky’s way. Marcus could only wonder what happened between the two of them before everyone got there.

Regardless, after everyone arrived, they all sat down and helped themselves to heaping portions of everything available. Marcus was pretty sure the Russians had a bet among themselves to see who could eat the most food, because they kept sneaking looks at each other and then grabbing more and more servings from the middle of the table. Marcus started to wonder if there would even be any leftovers remaining when the hooligans were finished.

Sometime during the meal, Russian techno started blasting from one of the speakers in the corner of the room. Ovi started bopping his head to the beat, while Nicky strapped him with a death glare.

“What?” Ovi asked, noticing Nicky’s  _ clearly  _ fond look. “Why you look at me like that, Nicke?”

“You know why,” Nicky said flatly.

“It come on every night, it’s on a timer,” Ovi responded.

“Turn it off.”

“Why?”

“You know it’s garbage.”

“And what do  _ you _ suggest we play? ABBA?” Ovi asked sarcastically.

Andre dropped his fork. “Don’t you dare disrespect ABBA,” he said darkly.

“Just change it, Alex,” Nicky said. “Anything else.”

Ovi raised his eyebrows. “Anything? Alright.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket, pressed a few buttons, and the Russian techno changed to the plucky twang of country music.

Nicky’s glare got even sharper. Marcus and Dima scrunched their noses like they’d just smelled something foul. Kuzy started groaning.

“Country? Really, Alex?” Nicky questioned.

“Now no one happy.”

Andre shrugged. “It’s not that bad.”

“That’s ‘cause you’re a hick, Burky,” Marcus chirped.

“Shut up, Jojo. Are you gonna eat those potatoes, or what?”

The music debacle did not end after dinner. No one was happy with the country, and the collective group called for a change. Ovi changed it to rap. Nicky snatched the phone and changed it to soft rock. Ovi stole it back and changed it to club.

And thus it went back and forth between the two of them, the music rapidly switching styles until it finally landed on pop love songs. Seemingly, Ovi and Nicky were in agreement and left the music alone.

That all seemed for naught when Dima loudly declared that the activity for the night would be Guitar Hero. Andre laid claim to the other instrument, and Marcus already bemoaned the cacophony of sound they were about to be accosted with between the music from the video game and the music coming over the speaker.

Marcus sat down on the couch, joined by Kuzy, who took the seat right next to him, and together they watched Dima and Andre attempt to navigate the game. The two of them, after much argument, decided on a Green Day song, and it quickly became very clear that they had no idea what they were doing.

“Which side of the screen is me?” Andre asked.

“The right. I think. You ready?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” A pause. “Wait, how do you play a note?”

“Press the keys, Burky.”

“That’s not doing anything.”

“Shut up, let’s play.”

They were bad. Very bad. It was worse than that time they’d had to sing those Christmas songs for PR. Marcus looked over at Ovi and Nicky off to the side of the TV, expecting to see disgusted looks on their faces reacting to the terrible faux guitar playing.

Instead, he saw Ovi singing along to the music from the speakers and directing the lyrics at Nicky, who was trying his best not to smile. If Marcus’s ears were right, it was the end of “Call Me Maybe,” and Ovi was poking at Nicky’s side and throwing his arm around Nicky’s shoulder. Nicky just rolled his eyes.

Then the song changed, and it was some cheesy, sappy Ed Sheeran song. Ovi started singing along to that too, looking Nicky in the eye, taking him by the hand, raising it over his head and slowly spinning him around.

Suddenly, Nicky’s face changed. They weren’t one verse into the song when Nicky firmly grabbed Ovi’s hand and dragged him upstairs without a word.

Marcus elbowed Kuzy. “Dude, Nicky just took Ovi upstairs.”

Kuzy, who had been engrossed in the shitty guitar playing, snapped his head toward Marcus. “Really?” He looked to where the two of them had been standing only a minute before. “Not surprised. Backy been dying to fuck all night.”

If Marcus had had a drink, he would have spit it out. “What? How do you know that?”

“Written all over his face. He’s been tense all night. Undressing Ovi with his eyes. Just glad they didn’t do it in front of us.”

Marcus’s eyes were still boggled. “Was it that obvious? Am I dumb? I didn’t really notice that.”

“You not dumb, I’m just good at reading people.”

“So you can tell how people are feeling and what they want?”

“More or less.”

“Alright.” Marcus pointed at Dima and Andre in front of them. “What about them?”

“Too easy, they too stupid right now.” Kuzy responded. “They both have big head and want to win, and will get very mad if they lose. Both are sore losers. And they very bad at this game. Also, Burky think Dima have unfair advantage, but really he doesn’t. He gonna call him a cheater.”

The current song ended, the points were totaled, Dima was declared the winner, and Andre threw up his hands in frustration.

“Why are my notes so different?” he yelled. “This isn’t fair!”

“You pick the bass!” Dima yelled back.

“You made me pick it on purpose!” Andre accused. “You’re a cheater!”

“Am not, you just bad.”

More yelling ensued, though that quickly changed to an argument over next song choices.

Kuzy jerked a thumb at the two of them. “See? Stupid.”

“Looks like we’ve both got stupid brothers, huh?” Marcus commented.

Kuzy laughed. “Yeah. Loud, bumbling, loving brothers.”

“I bet Andre’s a bit clingier than Dima, though.”

“For sure. Pretty sure Dima’s hit me more often than he’s hugged me.”

“Just like a brother. But I love our stupid brothers.”

“And our horny dads.”

Marcus exhaled sharply. “Yes, and our horny dads. Who are up there. Right now. And I do  _ not  _ want to think about that.”

“And then there’s you, Jojo.” Kuzy grinned. “Just you, the normal brother.”

“Hey I’ve got you, don’t I? I won’t be lonely.”

Kuzy smiled, saying nothing. His blue eyes, clear and bright, gazed softly at him. The look felt almost tangible. Kuzy opened his mouth to say something, but more yelling snapped their attention away.

“I want the guitar now, it’s more fun!” Andre shouted, reaching for the guitar.

“Fuck off, you made your choice, you’re stuck with it.”

“Fight me!”

“You’ll lose.”

Marcus just shook his head. For the next however many minutes, he sat back on the couch, watching Dima and Andre constantly get booed off the stage and trying not to think about Nicky and Ovi getting it on upstairs. At some point he felt Kuzy’s arm go up on the back of the couch behind him, keeping its distance, as if Kuzy was hesitant to get that close. But Marcus wouldn’t have minded.

A few moments later, Marcus turned to Kuzy. “What about me?”

Kuzy wrinkled his brow. “What you mean?”

“You said they were too stupid, so read me. What do I want?”

Kuzy smiled, and his eyes slowly looked Marcus up and down. “You don’t know what you really want. Not yet at least.”

Marcus pursed his lips. “I’m not exactly sure —”

“Right  _ now _ , what you want is to leave,” Kuzy resumed. “You don’t wanna think about Nicky and Ovi fucking, you wanna be somewhere quiet. Drink tea. Or maybe beer.”

Marcus let out a laugh. “You know me so well.”

“You wanna do me? I think you can do it.”

“No way, I’m not smart enough to figure out how you’re feeling.”

Kuzy shrugged. “Your loss.” He leaned in close and started whispering. “You wanna get out of here? I can take you home or something.”

“Oh god, yes.”

That was the moment they became best friends.

* * *

Usually, Marcus was great at beer pong. In fact, it was well-known that he was one of the best players on the team. However, that night he was paired with T.J. And T.J. was the absolute worst at beer pong.

This meant that after losing one game to Nicky and Ovi, a second to Nisky and Dima, and then a third to Tom and Andre, Marcus was just a  _ little _ bit tipsier than usual. Or maybe a lot.

On one hand, he had trouble walking on his own two feet. On the other hand, he was having a fantastic time. He slurred through the words of some top-forty hit on the karaoke machine, and he got up and danced on Ovi’s counter, both of which he would usually never do. Everything was fun and he loved  _ everyone  _ tonight. He found himself throwing his arm over the shoulder of just about every teammate and telling them that he loved them.

“I love you, Dima. Let loose a little more.”

“I love you, Carly. Never cut that hair, it’s a thing of beauty.”

“I love you, Grubz. You wanna take my picture sometime? I might actually look good if it’s done by you.”

“I love you, Nick. You’re like a brother to me. Or a dad. I can’t decide.”

After Nicky shrugged him off, Marcus stumbled on the wooden floor and started to slip, but someone’s arms reached out and caught him. The arms hoisted him to his feet and supported him around his waist. Marcus broke out into a stupid grin when he saw the person behind those strong arms.

“Hiiiiiiiiiiii, Kuz.” He blatantly looked him up and down. “You’re looking good tonight. I’m  _ really  _ digging that v-neck. And are those new jeans?”

Kuzy’s face looked red, but that might have just been the lighting. “These my party jeans. We at a party, no?”

Marcus giggled. “You’re funny.” He threw one arm around Kuzy’s shoulder and placed the other hand on Kuzy’s chest. “I love you Kuz, you always make me laugh.” He laid a kiss on Kuzy’s cheek and continued giggling.

This time, it was Kuzy’s turn to look Marcus up and down. “Are you drunk?” he asked.

“Uh,  _ duh _ ,” Marcus replied. “Are you not?”

“No, you know I don’t drink.”

“Oh, that’s right.” Marcus leaned in. “But you’re still the most fun guy in the room.”

In that touching moment, Marcus belched, right in Kuzy’s face. Kuzy scrunched his nose.

“I think you need to go home,” he stated.

“But I’m still having a good time,” Marcus protested.

“Fine. But can you walk?”

Kuzy released his grip, Marcus made a motion to take a step, and immediately started stumbling. Kuzy grabbed him again.

“I am taking you home.” Kuzy situated Marcus’s arm over his shoulder, held his waist, loaded him into his car, and then started on the road back to Marcus’s place.

Twenty-five minutes later, he had gotten Marcus home and into bed. Marcus was drowsily aware of the light wisps of Kuzy’s fingers as he tenderly drew the blankets and covers up to Marcus’s chin.

“You need anything?” Kuzy asked. “Water?”

“No.”

“Okay.” Kuzy took a step back from the bed. “I think I gonna go home, if you don’t need anything.” Kuzy started gingerly stepping towards the door.

“Actually,” Marcus spoke up, stopping Kuzy in his tracks. “Can you stay? I want you to stay.”

Kuzy walked back over to the bed. “You sure?”

“Of course. It’s still a party as long as you’re here.” They both smiled. “And there’s no one I’d trust more to help me when I inevitably vomit.”

Kuzy’s eyebrows shot to the top of his forehead. “Not even Nicky?”

“Not even Nicky.” Marcus confirmed. “Actually, there’s something I want you to have. Can you go to the uh...top drawer of my dresser...under my socks...there’s a zip pouch. Open it.”

Kuzy did as instructed. Inside was a key. “This for your house?”

Marcus nodded, though it made his head swim a little. “It’s the spare. And it’s for you. I want you to have it.”

“Jojo...you sure?”

“I’ve never been more sure. Drop in whenever you want. Or for whenever I need my sober hero to save me next.”

Kuzy held the key to his chest. “Jojo, this mean so much to me. I have to give you one to my place, too.”

“That’s for another time.” Marcus yawned. “Now get on the bed. I’m sleepy and want to be warm.”

Kuzy climbed on top of the covers next to Marcus, who curled up against him. Feeling warm, happy, and secure, Marcus drifted off to sleep.

That was the moment they became each other’s trusted person.

* * *

By now, it had become their routine. After home games, if they didn’t have to catch a plane to the next city, they would both go to Marcus’s house and decompress.

Tonight, they were sitting together on Marcus’s couch. Marcus was leafing through a book, and Kuzy had put a basketball game on the TV at very low volume. Kuzy was sitting at the end of the couch, his body facing the TV. Marcus was sitting perpendicular to him, his legs taking up most of the length of the couch and his back leaning against Kuzy’s side.

As the night wore on, Marcus’s head laid back on Kuzy’s shoulder, seemingly drawn to the warmth of his neck. Occasionally, Kuzy would lazily caress Marcus with the hand tucked against Marcus’s back, his fingers tangling in Marcus’s shirt and brushing against the skin hidden underneath.

Thirty minutes later, Marcus realized that they hadn’t said a word to each other all night. But then it occurred to him that they didn’t  _ need  _ to say anything. At this point in their relationship, they didn’t need to fill the space with unnecessary talk. They were comfortable enough with each other that they simply sat in silence, which was all they wanted. All that mattered was that they were together, comforted by each other’s presence.

Marcus couldn’t do this with just anyone. In fact, the thought of sitting in silence with anyone else felt incredibly anxiety-inducing. But with Kuzy, it felt as natural as gliding across the ice.

That was the moment he realized Kuzy was his favorite person.

* * *

He awoke to Kuzy shaking him awake in the middle of the night.

“Rise and shine, Jojo, we’re going on an adventure,” Kuzy said, his smile shining bright in the darkness.

Marcus groaned and threw his covers back over his head. “Again? It’s the middle of the night.”

“Yeah, and we’re going. Get up, let’s go.”

This was one of the occasions Marcus regretted giving Kuzy a key to his place. He groaned once more and slid out of bed. “Why do I always go along with this?”

“‘Cause you love it,” Kuzy said. “Come on, get in the car.”

Fighting back the urge to complete his beauty sleep was a difficult challenge for Marcus. His head leaned against the passenger side window, and his body was comforted by the vibrating hum of the car being driven down the empty streets of the city. 

He snuck a glance at Kuzy out of the corner of his eye. He was wrapped up in a coat, scarf, and gray beanie, and despite the heater pumping in the car, Marcus could see wisps of breath escaping into the air. The gleaming yellow and orange streetlights reflected onto his face, and made him look...well, Marcus’s groggy brain couldn’t find the word for it.

Kuzy made a turn onto the highway, and Marcus perked up. They usually didn’t go out of the city.

“Where are we going?” he asked.

“Somewhere new.” Kuzy’s eyes twinkled. “Just wait.”

When they reached the end of their car ride, he looked out and found that they were at National Harbor. He’d been here before, but he had never been here at night, and never when there was no one else around.

“Come on.” Kuzy gently urged him to get out of the car.

It was bitterly cold, but that was to be expected for the middle of December. It also meant it was getting very close to the holidays, and the entire harbor was decked out in dazzling lights. 

The two of them walked together until they were at the heart of the harbor, looking out at the water, completely awash in the lights.

It was one of the most beautiful sights he had ever seen. Twinkle lights were strung up everywhere, wrapped around trees, hung from rooftops, dangled between buildings. They had stepped into a wonderland.

Marcus was rooted to the spot, completely entranced by the magical scene around him, wanting to be absorbed by the beauty of it.

Kuzy took his hand and gently tugged. “Come on. The water the best part.”

Marcus let himself be led by the hand over to the pier. They went out about twenty feet from the shore and then looked back. Kuzy was right, this was the best part. From here, they were still a part of the lights, still bathed in their glow, but at this distance they could see the full spectacle. Stretched from building to building, the entire span of the harbor. Nothing but the bright, twinkling lights. And they were just far enough away that they could see it all reflected off the water. Shimmering and rippling, the colors bled out onto the water quietly undulating beneath their feet. It was breathtaking, and Marcus was left without words to describe what he was feeling.

“Kuzy,” he breathed. “Why did you bring me here?”

Kuzy shrugged. “We’ve never been here before. I thought you might like it. More your speed. And it’s nice, just the two of us.”

Suddenly, Marcus became very aware of the fact that they were alone. This was the type of place that usually had an active nightlife, but even the rowdiest partiers were asleep at two o’clock on a Tuesday. Without the pulsing life of any crowds, the harbor was serene. Tranquil. Just the lights, the water, and them.

He looked down at their hands, their fingers laced together. He wasn’t wearing gloves, but he wasn’t cold in the slightest.

Marcus gazed up at Kuzy’s face. The way he’d looked in the streetlights on the car ride over here paled in comparison to how he looked now. His face was alight in the glow of all the lights before them, making him shine like a spotlight. The lights off the water also reflected onto him, veiling him in a shimmer that made him look almost ethereal. Kuzy didn’t look quite real, like he was some kind of illusion or angel sent down to play hockey and guide him to places he’d never known before. Kuzy was just this great spirit, filled with so much energy and love, and Marcus felt so incredibly blessed that he’d chosen Marcus as the person he spent his time with. But Marcus knew he had to hang on. Like if he didn’t hold on tight enough, he would fly away.

Marcus clutched his hand tighter. He wasn’t going to let go.

Kuzy squeezed back, and his face turned to Marcus. He looked directly into his eyes, and Marcus, despite how much it threatened to make him tremble, did not break eye contact. Those eyes, as blue as the water beneath them, were so bright and lovely that Marcus just wanted to dive right in and lose himself. Kuzy’s gaze was so soft and tender it was almost like a physical touch, caressing his face and chest.

Kuzy smiled at him, and Marcus felt his insides light up like the scenery around him. It was an instinctual reaction; whenever Kuzy smiled, it made him smile. He couldn’t help it. Seeing that made him feel happy. Kuzy gazed at him, and he gazed right back. And even though it was below freezing, every part of him felt warm.

Then he felt something in his gut. Something clenched and twisted inside him. He felt weird and tingly throughout his whole body, and suddenly he had visions of pulling Kuzy close, running his free hand through his hair, and pressing up against the warmth of his chest, right here on this pier.

_ Oh shit _ , did he really want to do that?

He thought for a second as he felt Kuzy caress his palm with his thumb. Yup, he definitely did.

That was the moment he realized he felt something more.

* * *

It was a nothing moment. In the middle of the night, sleep-deprived, everyone sitting around waiting for a delayed plane. Marcus was wrapped up in his sweats, sitting in a chair across from Andre, who kept tossing a rubber ball up in the air. Marcus lazily watched Andre try to get the ball higher and higher each time, simply trying to keep his eyes open, until he felt someone’s hand gently touch his shoulder from behind.

He only needed the warmth spreading throughout his gut to know who it was.

“Hey, Jojo.”

Marcus turned his head and couldn’t help but smile when he saw Kuzy standing beside his chair, looking chipper as ever despite the late hour and the layover.

“Jojo, I’ve been looking for you. You leave your hat in your locker. I bring it back to you, your ears look cold.”

Without warning, Kuzy produced Marcus’s gray beanie, which Marcus hadn’t even realized was missing, from behind his back and slipped it onto Marcus’s head, taking great care to tuck in Marcus’s ears and every delicate wisp of hair. Marcus’s skin tingled at the light touch of his fingers.

Kuzy took a proud step back, keeping a hand on Marcus’s shoulder. “There, nice and cozy. You sit next to me on plane, yeah? You promise me.”

“Of course I will,” Marcus replied, sincerity and sleepiness seeping into his voice.

Kuzy beamed, his smile shining bright. “Good. Now, I have to beat Dima in cards. See you on plane.”

Kuzy’s hand trailed across Marcus’s arm until he was out of reach. Marcus watched him as he walked away, with Marcus’s drowsy brain already daydreaming about curling up next to him in the dark and drifting off to sleep together.

“I think you’re in love with him.”

Marcus’s head snapped up, suddenly on full alert. He hadn’t realized that Andre had stopped tossing the ball, and was now staring at him with a half-serious, half-smug expression on his face. Marcus blinked a couple of times, processing the abrupt statement.

“Excuse me?” he responded back in their native tongue. This was not a conversation he necessarily wanted the whole group to be privy to, even though he was still at risk of Nicky and a few of his more language-adept teammates overhearing.

“You heard me,” Andre said, looking Marcus straight in the eye, challenging him.

“I am not in love with him, that’s ridiculous.”

“Is it?” Andre asked, crossing his arms over his chest. “I mean, you guys are together all the time. You go to each other’s houses a lot. You flirt. You know each other’s Starbucks orders. And that look I just saw? From both of you? That doesn’t lie.”

Marcus blushed red. “Burky, I think the sleep deprivation is getting to your head. I’m not in love with him any more than I’m in love with you. You’re seeing things.”

Andre said nothing and shook his head, clearly believing he was still right. He went back to throwing the ball in the air.

Marcus did not like the smug look on Andre’s face. He would not let Andre have the last laugh on this subject.

He stood up abruptly. “Excuse me, I need to go to the restroom,” he pronounced, pushing by Andre and marching into the nearest men’s room, where he promptly stood in front of a sink.

He splashed his face with water, trying to collect himself. He looked up at his own reflection in the mirror and gripped the edge of the sink. Had he been lying to himself all this time?

It had sounded ridiculous coming from Andre, but the more Marcus thought about it, the less confident he became about his own words. He had known for awhile know that what he felt for Kuzy was stronger than what he felt for anybody else, and whatever was between them was definitely not platonic. But Marcus had just thought that he liked looking at him, or touching him, or being close to him. He’d accepted that he had a schoolgirl crush.

Now, he wondered, maybe there was something deeper to it.

They were linemates. Friends. Kuzy was the person he trusted to watch over him, and he was the first person he called when he needed help or when he wanted to share a thought with someone. Kuzy made him laugh, and he made him feel comforted and safe. Marcus let him have complete access to his life. He thought about him every morning, every night, every time he saw a loud bird. Much more often than if this were just a physical crush.

Marcus stared hard into his own eyes. Was this...could this be...love?

No, it couldn’t be. He paused. Could it? He thought for a moment. What did he expect from a person that he’d ultimately fall in love with? Someone who makes you feel happy, appreciated, safe, and who you treasure and want to spend all your time with. That was dangerously close to what he felt for Kuzy. It might have been exactly what he felt.

But he didn’t want to admit that. That was terrifyingly real.

Instead, he left the bathroom, feeling unsettled and out of sorts. He told himself that this wasn’t a big deal, he didn’t feel  _ that _ strongly, and that he needed to forget that this conversation with himself ever happened. He sat back down in his seat. Andre was still across from him. He didn’t say anything, but he gave Marcus a smug, knowing look. Marcus didn’t like that look one bit.

When they were finally ready to get onto the plane, Marcus saw Kuzy waiting for him by the door, waving and smiling. Marcus’s gut clenched, a fuzzy feeling started spreading from his chest, and a smile tugged hard at his face even though he tried to fight it. Then the other shoe dropped.

_ Oh, fuck _ .

He couldn’t deny it anymore.

That was the moment he realized he was in love.

* * *

There was nothing to do but hang their heads. Once again, the season ended with a punch in the gut. Year after year, the exact same result.

Failure. Failure. Failure.

Marcus sat in his locker, his head in his hands, palms pressed against his eyes. He didn’t move a muscle, for fear of breaking down uncontrollably. He hadn’t even taken off his gear yet; the only thing that had come off was his jersey. He couldn’t end his season just yet. He had to take a moment. Or two. Or five.

He felt someone squeeze into his locker and slide up next to him. He didn’t have to open his eyes to know who it was. Kuzy was pressed up close to him, touching from their hips down to their ankles. Just his warmth made Marcus feel better. Not great, but better.

Marcus could tell that Kuzy wanted to talk, to at least say something. But Kuzy didn’t press him. He let him take his time, simply sitting with him in his frustration. Kuzy put his arm around Marcus’s waist, his fingers lightly squeezing Marcus’s side, drawing himself ever so slightly closer. Marcus couldn’t help but lean into him, drawn in by the safety and comfort of his hold. After a few moments, Marcus dropped his hands from his face and fully sunk into him, resting his head on Kuzy’s shoulder. Still, they sat in silence. Kuzy wouldn’t talk until he knew Marcus was ready to say something.

Marcus lifted his head from Kuzy’s shoulder and looked into those blue eyes, which somehow, despite everything, still managed to have a sparkle in them.

Kuzy spoke first. “It gonna be alright, Jojo.” His voice was quiet, intimate, a rumble just for Marcus to hear.

Marcus exhaled. “How do you know?”

“I don’t,” Kuzy responded. “But it not gonna do anyone any good to beat yourself up over it.”

“But it sucks. And we failed.”

“I know it sucks. But we not failures. Sometimes, it just not gonna work out.”

“Kuz, I’ve been at this a little longer than you. When this happens again, and again, and again, it’s hard not to feel cursed.”

“Trust me, this no curse. Now, my grandmother’s house —  _ that  _ was cursed.”

Marcus couldn’t help but smile at that, and he could see Kuzy’s own smile brighten in response.

“I hate seeing everyone so down. It’s just a game, it’s not like somebody died.”

“I mean, it’s our lives, Kuz. We work so hard and we still can’t do enough. It’s difficult not to be a little hard on ourselves.”

“It’ll happen, Jojo,” Kuzy said, his voice becoming gentle. “It just not time yet.”

“I wish I had your confidence,” Marcus said. “How are you so upbeat?”

Kuzy shrugged. “I just am. If I let myself get too serious, I’m never happy.” He grinned and nudged Marcus. “Also, just sitting with you make me happy.”

Marcus’s face blushed beet red. Butterflies wreaked havoc on his stomach, and he had to resist an overwhelming urge to just throw himself around Kuzy. Not the place. He settled for wrapping his arm around his waist, like Kuzy was doing to him, and for pulling himself even closer, trying to press as close as their gear would allow. Kuzy seemed to like that, and he shifted his hand from Marcus’s waist up to his shoulder where his fingers played in Marcus’s short hair, traced lines on his shoulder, and caressed the skin behind his ear. Marcus found the aching pain of the playoff loss suddenly a lot less world-ending.

“We gotta find a way to lighten the mood,” Kuzy said, turning his head to look at Marcus. “What you think, prank on Burky? I know you love doing that. Maybe in a few days, his anxiety probably bad right now. Maybe the whole team go out and do something fun before we all leave? Lunch, or zoo or something? Maybe funny movie, we all need a laugh…”

Kuzy went on and on about his ideas for lifting team morale, and Marcus simply listened and gazed at that shining face. He had no idea how Kuzy could be so positive while Marcus was lower than he’d ever felt before, but he admired him for it. Loved him for it. Marcus may have had trouble thinking positive at times, but Kuzy, through thick and thin, always kept positive, lightened the mood, and tried to make everyone smile no matter how dire the situation felt. Marcus had no idea how he did it, but he felt incredibly lucky to have this bright ray of sunshine in his life.

That was the moment he realized he never wanted to lose him.

* * *

He blacked out when they threw their gloves in the air and hurtled over the boards.

They grabbed each other. They screamed at the top of their lungs. Some of them cried. But it didn’t matter, everyone finally let the emotions run free — they did it. They won the Stanley Cup.

Marcus was vaguely aware of throwing himself among a mass of writhing bodies. He hugged and shouted with every teammate he could get his hands on. Burky. Nicky. Djoos. Beags. Carly. Braden. Ovi.

But those were all a blur. His brain only focused when he spotted Kuzy and then skated into his arms. He threw his arms around Kuzy’s neck, and Kuzy clutched Marcus around the chest. They stood there, lightly spinning on the ice, and they held each other longer and gripped each other tighter than any of their other teammates. They held each other in tight fistfuls of jersey, never wanting to let each other go.

They didn’t say a word to each other. Marcus was pretty sure they couldn’t hear anything over the roar of the arena anyway. But they didn’t need to say anything. All they needed was to be together, to feel each other’s closeness. Marcus buried his face into the crook of Kuzy’s neck, feeling himself starting to get emotional and longing for the warmth and safety of Kuzy, who pressed his cheek against Marcus’s head.

In a whirlwind, they found themselves lined up with the team and somehow separated in the chaos; Marcus was flanked by Andre and John, who both had their arms thrown over his shoulders.

And then it started, the moment Marcus was starting to believe he’d never live to see: laps with the Stanley Cup. Ovi got it started, and one by one, everyone got their turn to take a lap. Beags took a lap, then Carly, and after Braden went out for his lap, he turned around and skated the Cup right into Marcus’s arms.

Then Marcus had a moment he’d never forget in his life — he skated out on his own and had his lap with the Stanley Cup. He hoisted that thirty-four pound silver trophy above his head, letting out a guttural scream of joy to the approving roar of all the Caps fans in Las Vegas. The moment was much too short. He kissed the Cup, and turned to make the return trip.

As Marcus approached the line of his teammates, he knew exactly who he was going to pass it to, as if there was ever a question in his mind.

At about ten feet away, they made eye contact, and the world slowed down. They looked into each other’s eyes and something just clicked for Marcus. He had finally accomplished the ultimate goal, the thing that he had been working his entire life for. But there was still something more he wanted. Why had he waited so long? He’d known what he’d wanted for a long time, and there was no reason to wait any longer.

Marcus finished his lap, and as he passed the Cup from his hands to Kuzy’s, he knew was going to do it tonight, right here in this arena. Nothing like the Cup to finally give you courage.

His heart burst with love and pride as he watched Kuzy take his lap with the Cup. He didn’t bother to hide his emotions; his smile took up his entire face, his chest clenched, and a tear or two escaped his eye. Kuzy, one of the most talented hockey players he’d ever seen, deserved this. They all deserved this.

Kuzy returned, shining brighter than he ever had before. He handed the Cup off to Dima and slid his arm around Marcus, pulling him close to his side. They watched the rest of the Cup laps and took in the moment together.

As soon as everyone had a lap, the group dispersed for pictures and media interviews. Somehow, Kuzy managed to pry the Cup from Ovi’s hands and skated over to Marcus.

“Jojo! Let’s take a picture!”

Marcus grabbed hold of the Cup and turned towards the nearest photographer. He smiled big until the camera flashed, documenting this moment between the two of them for the rest of time.

As soon as the picture was taken, Tom skated by and snagged the Cup away. Marcus and Kuzy skated around together, making conversation, giving interviews, taking pictures, but never separating. Soon, though, teammates started making their way off to the locker room, and Kuzy made a motion to follow. Marcus grabbed his arm.

“Hey, Kuz, can I talk to you for a minute? Privately?” he asked, his heart racing.

“Of course.”

Kuzy led him off the ice, and they made their way down the tunnel and stopped past the locker room, where it was much quieter.

Kuzy leaned against the wall. “What’s going on, Jojo?”

Marcus took a deep breath. This was it. “Kuz...you know that I like you a lot. And I’m pretty sure that you like me a lot too.”

Kuzy grinned. “You not wrong.”

Marcus’s lip pulled upwards. “You’re my favorite person, and these last few years being linemates and spending my days with you have been the best years of my life. And I realized...well, I think I’ve known for awhile...that I want something more.” He reached out and took Kuzy’s hand in his. “I have very strong feelings for you. Like...I am simply overwhelmed by how strongly I feel. I’ve denied it for a long time, but I don’t want to do myself that disservice anymore. I want to take this to the next level. You know, if you want to, of course.”

His heart raced like a runaway locomotive. There it was, he had finally laid it all on the table. A beat passed, and Marcus waited with baited breath.

Then Kuzy smiled wide. “Are you saying you love me, Jojo?”

Marcus’s breath caught. He hadn’t expected such a confident question, complete with that trademark Kuzy snap that he loved so dearly. He was so caught up with emotions that he couldn’t do anything but answer honestly.

“Yes.”

Marcus only had to look at that utterly beaming smile and the glance of those blue eyes down to his lips to realize that he never should have worried.

Under most circumstances, Marcus never would have been the one to make the move. But tonight he had been given new life. He bridged the distance between their already close faces and met him with a kiss, one that felt long, long overdue.

Marcus started off slow and gentle, hesitant to rush too fast and take in too much at once. Despite the scratchiness of both of their playoff beards, the kiss was remarkably soft. He breathed him in slowly, wanting to savor the taste of him and take his time.

Marcus drew away, exhaling deeply. He looked at Kuzy’s face, awash with a warm glow. Knowing that it was for him made the butterflies want to flutter right out of his chest.

Kuzy took both of Marcus’s hands in his and held them to his chest. “Took you long enough.”

Marcus raised his eyebrow. “You flirting with me? Or are you trying to say something to me?”

Kuzy shrugged a little. “Just been waiting for you to be ready. Thought I clear with all that flirting, I ready whenever you are.”

Marcus furrowed his eyebrows. “What?”

“Oh, you didn’t know?”

“Uh, no?”

“Of course I was flirting.” He grinned. “I always flirted with you, Jojo.”

“Always?” Marcus’s heart pounded. “Wait, how long have you...you know, felt this way?”

“You mean, how long I been in love with you?” Marcus blacked out for half a second. “Very long time. I think when we become linemates, that’s when it start. But I realize it...you remember that time we all at Ovi’s house, you and me and Backy and Burky and Dima? And they play Guitar Hero really badly?”

“Yes,” Marcus whispered.

“That’s the moment I knew,” Kuzy said, pressing the hands even closer to his own chest.

“Kuz,” Marcus said softly. “That was years ago. Why didn’t you say something?”

“You not in love with me then,” Kuzy said simply. “Or at least, you don’t know it. And that okay. But not fair of me to say anything and put that on you.”

There was a whole lot of turbulence going on in Marcus’s chest. To know that Kuzy had felt this way this whole time, basically since they’d known each other, was overwhelming.

“I wish I’d known. Maybe I’d have gotten off my ass and done something earlier.”

“I mean, I try to give you hint. A lot of hints, actually. Nudge you in right direction. But you not catch on, apparently.”

“Wait, hints?”

“Oh Jojo,” he said with a loving sigh. “You really think I take you out in the middle of the night ‘cause we just friends? That I go to your house and hold you close just to be friendly? I’m certainly not doing that with Dima, that’s for sure.”

“So you spent all that time with me hoping to get me to fall in love with you?” Marcus asked.

“Well, no, I don’t wanna make you do anything you don’t wanna do. I do all that because I wanna be with you all the time, and show you how much I care. And of course I hope you love me, but I not expecting anything,” Kuzy said. “But even if you not love me right away, just being with you make me happy.”

Marcus looked at him fondly. “Being with you makes me happy, too.” He sighed. “I think we need to start doing that again, it really was wonderful. I think that night at National Harbor might have been my favorite.”

“Me too,” Kuzy agreed. “I thought you gonna kiss me that night.”

“I wanted to,” Marcus admitted. “I almost did. I think that might have been the first time I realized I felt... _ something _ , and it terrified me.”

Kuzy gently laid a hand on Marcus’s cheek. “You don’t have to be scared, Jojo. I not going anywhere. And we can go however slow you like.”

“Well, maybe not too slow.” He grinned. “I spent way too many years being blind and not seeing what was right in front of me. I don’t want to waste any more time.” He wrapped his arms around the back of Kuzy’s neck. “Kuz, I love you, and I love to be with you. You’re my favorite person and my best friend, and I don’t want to be without you. And I hope we can start something new. Together.”

Kuzy smiled one more time, and this one might have been the most beautiful. “That can be arranged.” He touched his forehead to Marcus’s, his warm breath tickling Marcus’s face. “I love you too, Jojo. Now, I gonna kiss you again. And this time I not holding back.”

And he meant it. For as sweet and tender as the first kiss was, this one was full of passion. Kuzy cradled Marcus’s head in one of his hands, and he kissed him deeply with a hunger and intensity that awakened something inside him. Marcus grabbed the collar of Kuzy’s jersey and pulled him closer. Their kiss somehow got deeper, and Kuzy got his tongue involved, teasing it into Marcus’s mouth and making Marcus want to move this into some kind of dark room.

For a moment he was starting to think they wouldn’t stop until they had fully merged, but they were interrupted by a loud gasp.

“Oh my god!!!”

They broke apart abruptly and turned towards the source of the interruption. It was Andre, staring at them with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. From what Marcus could see, Andre’s brain was short-circuiting.

“Oh my god! Holy shit! You guys — I knew it! I fucking called it!” A wide grin spread across Andre’s face. “I told you, Jojo, I  _ told  _ you!”

Marcus’s face went red. Kuzy just grinned. “He finally come around and say he love me, Burky.”

Andre’s eyes boggled. “Oh my god. Holy shit, I knew it. I mean, congrats guys, that’s awesome. Also, ew, I don’t really wanna catch that again. And you guys have to come with me  _ right now _ .”

Andre grabbed Marcus by the wrist, with Kuzy following, and dragged him into the locker room. The room was vibrating with the deafening music that was playing, and was hopping with the pure, unbridled Cup-winning joy pouring out from all the guys in the room. Just being in there made Marcus get swept up with feeling, and it reminded him of why he got the balls to do this in the first place.

Andre managed to get the attention of whoever was in charge of the music and got them to turn it down a little bit — still loud, but no longer a threat to eardrums.

Andre stood up on a bench and shouted to the whole room: “I just caught Jojo kissing Kuzya!”

About half the room shouted “What?!” and another quarter shouted “Really?!” while the remainder stood with widened eyes.

Andre grinned big. “It finally happened, boys!”

Marcus expected some chirps. He expected maybe a couple  _ congratulations _ . He did not expect someone across the room to shout “Pay up!”

Suddenly guys were digging out cash from their stalls and passing bills between one another, the recipients with looks of glee and the distributors grumbling. Well, grumbling as much as they could on a night like this.

Marcus whipped his head towards Andre. “Were you guys placing  _ bets _ on us?”

Andre nodded as Brett slapped a five in his hand. “Yeah. It’s been  _ unbearable _ watching this go on for  _ so long _ , so we placed bets on if it would ever happen. Obviously, I’m on the winning side.”

“How could you guys have known?  _ I  _ didn’t know until recently.”

“It’s written all over your face, Jojo. I knew it was gonna happen sooner or later. Actually, that was another part of the bet: not only  _ if _ it would happen, but  _ when _ . Osh was the big winner there, he got it down almost to the day.”

They looked over at T.J., who had amassed a large pile of cash.

“How could you, T.J.?” Kuzy shouted.

“Oh man, being your linemate this year has been  _ insufferable _ . I’m a bigger third wheel than Tom with Nicky and Ovi — and that’s saying something. I know you two well enough to know when this was gonna happen, so why not profit a little off of it?”

Kuzy tossed a sock in his direction. “How  _ dare  _ you betray us like this, Oshbabe!”

Words were exchanged and a few things were thrown, but that died down quickly when someone brought out the champagne, and the bet was quickly forgotten.

It was hard to feel anything but unbridled joy and revel in the sensation of winning together. Someone started blasting “We Are The Champions,” and they all huddled together, singing along atrociously, their arms around each other’s shoulders. They lived in the moment, for they knew this might not ever happen again.

The music died down to a dull roar, and the guys split off, laughing and chatting with each other. Marcus and Kuzy sat in a stall together. Kuzy held him in a tight hug from behind, the comfort of his embrace feeling just right. Kuzy rested his chin on Marcus’s shoulder, and Marcus placed a hand on Kuzy’s arm around him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in. He could feel Kuzy’s heartbeat on his back. Marcus felt completely at peace. Here he was, taking in a championship with the teammates he cherished so much, in the arms of the guy that he loved. He didn’t want this feeling to go away.

One of these moments would fade away into memory. The other, if he was lucky, he would get to have every day for a very long time.

That was the moment their lives changed for good.


End file.
